My Idle Conversation

Recently my pride was injured. After what I thought was a great visit with old friends, being used by God, & visiting with those I care deeply about, I was shot where it hurts most. My pride got the better of me and I did the very thing God has instructed me not to do. That is to defend myself. Why do I have such a hard time following God's instruction? Here is what God showed me only 2 days after my disobedience, I would have gotten it sooner, but I avoided him altogether yesterday. Psalm 50:23 - Whoso offereth praise glorifieth me: and to him that ordereth his conversation aright will I shew the salvation of God. Order: To lead, To conduct, To subject to rules or laws. Conversation: Behavior, Deportment: Manner of acting, behavior, demeanor, conduct, management. (notice that it is more then simple chit chat) Aright: In a right form. Rightly: Honestly, uprightly, truth or fact, according to the divine ill or moral rectitude. Salvation: Preservation from destruction or calamity. Delivered from Enemies. Basically, I felt like God was telling me, that I was ruining a good thing, by not conducting and managing myself. See I defended myself and in doing that I showed selfishness and anger. I was also mean and was getting away from the truth of God as I focused on personal hurts and pride. I can't just glorify and praise God with my lips, I must also lead my behavior in a manner that is right and according to God's will not my own will. I believe God would have delivered me from the calamity I am now in, had I just simply followed the words in this verse. God didn't end it there. He wanted to hit it home with me. Apparently, my hard head needs confirmation and this confirmation was hard to swallow. Mat 12:34 O generation of vipers, how can ye, being evil, speak good things? for out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh.

Mat 12:35 A good man out of the good treasure of the heart bringeth forth good things: and an evil man out of the evil treasure bringeth forth evil things.

Mat 12:36 But I say unto you, That every idle word that men shall speak, they shall give account thereof in the day of judgment.

Mat 12:37 For by thy words thou shalt be justified, and by thy words thou shalt be condemned. I admit in defending myself, I was not speaking good things. Which sadly revealed my heart. Weather I want to admit it or not. Idle: Unprofitable, not tending to edification. Edification: A building up, in a moral & religious sense. Instruction, improvement and progress of the mind, in knowledge, in morals or in faith and holiness. I went from edifying according to God, to idle, according to me. I left the instruction of improvement, to the instruction of I'm a good person and you need to know that. But the Bible is clear, no one is good, not one. I now must go and apologize to my friend and seek forgiveness for my idle words & my selfish conversation. I also pray that what I recently did does not mess up what God was doing while we were with them. I can only pray that as I get my conversation corrected that I will be delivered from this calamity. Definitions taken from the original Websters Dictionary.